Trapped in My Image

After years of struggle, Raj Singh Chaudhary shot to fame with the success of Gulaal. Inevitably, Bollywood wants him to play the same character again and again. 

I went to study in a hostel at the age of five. When you are growing up away from home, you are always fighting for yourself. Even if you get hurt, there’s no mother or father to run to—you just get up and go on. I am, therefore, a fiercely independent person. The character of Dileep Singh that I played in Gulaal was a man completely mollycoddled by his parents. In the opening scene, when he comes to study in another town, his brother, instead of giving him money, tells him it is with the servant and to take as much as he wants. When you are that protected, you tend to become meek, a bit of a sissy. Dileep Singh was different from me in every way possible. 

He even looked my opposite. I was a runner-up in the Gladrags Manhunt competition and a professional model before I got into films. Stars usually build and flaunt their six packs for a movie. In my case, it was the opposite. I removed those six packs on my abdomen because Dileep Singh was somebody who would never have worked out in his life. He was supposed to be thin. I completely stopped exercising. Gulaal took a long time in the making. I first wrote the script based on my ragging experiences. Then I met Anurag Kashyap in 2002 and he rewrote it to bring in the Rajputana setting. We had no producer with money and the making of the movie dragged on. In between, Anurag made Black Friday and Dev D. And all the while, I remained thin because we kept starting on the movie and then stalling it for want of funds. After we finished shooting, I waited for two to three months in case there was some patchwork needed. It was only after the edit was locked that I started working out again. But for half a decade, all I did was run or play tennis for exercise.

What I did in Gulaal was very difficult for an actor. The character was weak and meek. He was extremely understated. It’s difficult in acting to say things without saying anything. To get the whole body language correct. I had to break myself down to that level. But all the work paid off when the movie released. The reactions were excellent and my work was appreciated. I remember being invited to a lecture at IIM-Indore and being told that the only time the auditorium had filled up was when Gulaal was screened and that too at 10 in the night. The movie even made good money. I did not expect to be a star overnight. Or that I would be suddenly signing Yashraj and Karan Johar films. I expected to get a good and regular stream of work. 

Starting about two months after the release in March 2009, I got offers for four films. But there was a catch: they all wanted the same look and the same character. In one case, I read the script and it looked like a decent one. Then we had a discussion and the director said, “No no, not like this. I want you like the way you were in Gulaal.” I didn’t want to do the film after that. Of the four offers, I took up just one film and that too after we worked on the script to change it a little. I told them I would play a simple man, but not go that simple. They agreed. 

Stereotyping happens because people don’t know who you are. If a known actor, like Aamir Khan, does a role like the one I played, he won’t get stereotyped. But because Gulaal was my first lead film, I was immediately slotted into a category. A big production house called me up once. They had heard I was good actor and wanted to cast me in their movie. When I went there, the producer began by asking about the money. I quoted a certain amount, but he brought it down. After I reluctantly agreed, they called me for a look test. A look test is one in which they style you up as the character, but you don’t have to enact anything. But when I went, they gave me a scene to do. I was irritated that they were taking an audition without informing me. “You should tell me in advance if you want to do an audition,” I told them. “I’ll then read the script. And if I feel that I want to do the movie, then I will appear for the audition. I don’t want to work with you.” 

They then raked up the whole image issue; about how I was in Gulaal and the role in their film was of a heroic, glamorous character. I told them that being a former model, a glamorous role was the easiest thing for me to do. I refused to do the audition. They persisted and the producer started speaking like they normally talk—“Arre darling, kar de na yaar, please yaar, tu chahiye yaar.” I was so angry by that time that I said inko dikahte hain (let me show them). In that fury, the audition went off very well. They promised to sign me the next day and seal the deal. Till today, I have not heard from them.

The problem is that if you do a loud, heroic, over-the-top character mouthing deadly dialogues, that makes you a great actor for most of Bollywood. That’s not the case. An actor plays every role according to the character. My disappointment is that a lot of people did not see or understand that Dileep Singh was a character I played. I met a topline director during the trial screening of a movie. He said, “Very good work. But I thought you were like that character.” 

“I am not. I am like this,” I told him. “But I’ll take it as a compliment because if you thought so, then I must have done something good.” He started laughing.

The second typecast is of someone who only does serious realistic films—‘woh type ka actor hai.’ But I do those roles because it is pointless to do a commercial film unless it’s with a big production house. The alternative is to do films that at least give me good roles and appreciation as an actor.

A movie of mine, Antardwand, released recently and now suddenly, people are thinking that he’s normal and not like ‘that’. Also, consciously, I am doing roles which will help me break out of the stereotype. I play a tough cop in a film produced by Anurag. It’s on the other side of the spectrum from Dileep Singh. I am even looking out for negative roles. I want to do a variety of characters so that I don’t get slotted.

As told to Madhavankutty Pillai

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