Confessions of a Male Gynaecologist

My wife doesn’t know that many of her friends are my patients

I am a man in a woman’s private world. I decided to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician because I wanted to earn as soon as I finished studying. In other specialities, gestation periods are long, but getting started in this field is easy. Also, I was genuinely fascinated by gynaecology.

Though I had studied the female body in textbooks, nothing prepared me for the sight of the body of my first female patient. It was a decade and a half ago when I was an intern with the Sir JJ group of hospitals. As I touched the pelvic area of the patient, my hands got clammy. I did not speak as I was scared my voice would wobble. Those three minutes were the toughest of my life. Examination done, I vomited my guts out.

My family didn’t understand why I wanted to be a ‘lady doctor’. They hide the fact that I am a gynaecologist. When female relatives come home, they are self conscious.

I was flooded with marriage proposals. I actually had to back off from one because my parents had told the girl’s family I was a heart specialist.

I did manage to find a wife, but she is completely opposed to my work. In the initial years, she would jump off the bed if I touched her. “How can you touch all those women and come and touch me,” she would say. I even took her to the examination room. But her angry presence was not good for my patients.

The constant presence of women in my life is an issue. Fortunately, she doesn’t know that many of her friends are my patients. I’ve stopped listening to her. Maybe, that’s why I am a dedicated doctor (patients say so). As a result, sex with my wife is not frequent.

Many of my patients confess that they prefer a male doctor to a female one. I don’t know why. But not every woman who walks into my room is comfortable. There is always a nurse in the room as I am scared that some woman will level baseless allegations over the physical examination.

Unlike men, women have many health problems. Seeing all that they go through has made me respect them. My wife says I am more like a woman. That I have too much compassion.

The doctor works in a state hospital in South Mumbai.

About The Author

Haima Deshpande