Confessions of an Upcoming Model

“One night, the Chennai-based model coordinator who boasted of Bollywood contacts called with the offer of a holiday with him”

I started modelling at my college in Bangalore, which had a fashion society. The occasional ramp walks in college functions gave me an adrenaline rush and being called a model was a definite high.

Competition, though, is intense and translates into quite a few catfights in the make-up room. At a selection trial for a fashion week, one of the judges happened to be the boyfriend of a model I was not on very good terms with. Not surprisingly, I was not selected. In this field, it is your ability to build the right contacts that matters, not just how good you are. But you are bracketed nonetheless— “Look at her, she is so close to the coordinator” or “No wonder she bagged the contract, the coquette that she is.”

When I started out, I auditioned for a commercial ad. One night, the Chennai-based model coordinator who boasted of Bollywood contacts called me up to offer a holiday to Kodaikanal. He promised to send his driver with the ticket and to pick me up from the airport. I was too shocked to react and just disconnected the phone.

Guys are propositioned as well—in fact, more than girls, since most designers are gay. Often, a lucrative offer is just a night away. I have kept my integrity, though. Just because I have a drag from a cigarette or a couple of drinks at the pub or wear clothes that complement my figure doesn’t mean I am easy game.

There is more substance to us than the partying, cocaine-snorting or flesh-flaunting depicted in movies. Behind the airbrushed versions of us in commercial ads is unadulterated hard work. We ramp-walk in six-inch heels even with bruised toes and tonnes of make-up. Then there is the whole routine of getting dressed up—stripping you down, pinning you up and even shoving socks into bras to make your breasts look bigger. Sometimes, I am driven to the point of a breakdown.

Modelling as a profession is shortlived, and models either end up as socialites or fashion designers. I dabble in theatre at times and am trying to make inroads into the world of acting.

As told to Farzana Nizam

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