Confessions of a Theatre Actress

“Once, a chaiwallah at Prithvi Theatre unknowingly walked on to the stage during a performance and asked, ‘Who had asked for tea?’ The actor answered ‘no one’”

My landlord doesn’t know I’m an actor. No landlord wants an actor, especially a theatre actor, as a tenant. It’s a morality issue. They think actors are promiscuous. But the theatre world is as promiscuous as possibly the corporate world. The difference is we don’t hide it.

My worst fear, my worst moment as an actor, is when I blank out on stage. You know your line is coming up, but you can’t remember it to save your life. The more you try, the further the line goes. That’s when you improvise. Things go wrong all the time. Once a guy dislocated his shoulder on stage and walked off. Luckily, it was the rare occasion when we had an understudy to take over.

Once a set designer had an argument with the director and stole part of the set in the last minute and waltzed off. The third bell had rung and the set was still being reconstructed. But screw-ups are what make theatre life interesting. In the end, that’s what you remember. Like the instance when a chaiwallah at Prithvi Theatre unknowingly walked on to the stage during a performance and asked, ‘Who had asked for tea?’ The actor just answered ‘no one’ and the chaiwallah left. Another time, a member of the audience stood up during a performance of Hamlet and asked the actor, ‘Excuse me, what inspires you?’
Many actors use the theatre as a platform for films and TV. But not every theatre actor wants to be a film star. When I introduce myself as a theatre actor, people often ask what TV shows I have done. Theatre has no value to them.

If you want to be a theatre actor, be prepared to earn nothing for years. We all do temp jobs like voiceovers, ads or desk jobs to compensate. I’m grateful for each show that I do. The stage is my temple. It’s an adrenaline rush. The sign of a bad actor is someone who gets carried away by the adrenaline and starts playing to the gallery.

English and Hindi plays are nowhere close to commercial Marathi and Gujarati theatre. Those plays go house-full, those actors can survive on theatre. It’s because theatre is part of their cultural mindset, that’s where families go.

(The actress is based in Mumbai and is in the cast of a long-running comedy)

As told to Shubhangi Swarup

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